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Advice
This area
is to give you some advice about the lifestyle. This should
be of help to you if you are just starting out on the
journey of discovery. If you feel there are questions you
have, that are not covered by this section please e-mail us
and we will attempt to answer any questions you may have.
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Etiquette
Contacting
others
When
contacting an advertiser from this site there are a few things to always keep in
mind.
Only contact
people that match your requirements if an advert is asking for something that
you can not delivery do not waste your time or theirs.
Try to tell
the advertiser what is was about their advert that caught your eye. This will
show that you have taken the time to read their advert and that you do have an
interest in them as people.
Tell the
advertiser about yourselves and how you think you meet their requirements. It is
a good idea to also tell the adviser your likes and dislikes including smoking,
safe sex & sexual tendencies as this could save you time if you actually
meet..
Always attach
a photo of yourself and your partner and ensure that if you are replying to an
advert the photo shows your faces. As you can be sure that most advertisers will
want to see what you look like before they will be prepared to meet you.
One piece of
advice to single males most advisers are a lot more interested in seeing your face
rather than your bits, this is one of the biggest mistakes a lot of men make.
Replying
to an e-mail
When your
advert has been replied to it is common manners to reply back, even if its
thanks but no thanks.
If the reply
matches your requirements and you have no further question that need to be
answered by e-mail either reply with your contact number or request a contact
number from the other people.
It is
important to make contact by phone as early as possible. This will let you know
how much you have in common with the other people and whether you hit it off on
a personal level.
Always ensure
that all parties have spoken to each other before you arrange a meeting.
Meeting
a new contact
There are
three ways in which you can meet your new friends.
1.
Common ground.
This usually
take place in a pub or hotel where every one feels comfortable and people feel
they can leave quickly if things don't work out.
2. At there
home
The one thing
to remember here is that the people you are visiting having probable spent time
running around the house to make sure it is nice and tidy to receive their new
guests. Treat their home as you would like people to treat yours.
Always take
something with you a bottle of wine or some flowers for the lady is always a
nice touch and should get the meeting off on the right foot.
As you are in
their house it is usually the hosts that will suggests if things should go on to
the next stage. It is important to always be honest about how you feel and if
you feel that moving onto the next stage is not for this meeting you should tell
your hosts.
3. At your
home
Always ensure
that you home is nice and tidy and that the bathroom has a supply of fresh clean
towels.
Never apply
any pressure to your guests and just try to develop a friendship as this will
make everyone a lot more relaxed.
Going
to a party
If the party
you are attending is a free party always ensure that you take something to
contribute towards the food and drink.
If people are
playing in a room with the door closed this usually means that they do not want
to be disturbed.
If people are
playing in an open room always ask before you join in. If people say no or hold
their hand palm outwards accept that they do not what you to join them.
Always treat
the home you are in with respect, put yourself in the hosts shoes and if you are
still there at the end of the party offer to assist in the clear up.
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Getting
Started
Advice
to new couples
The easiest
way to start within this lifestyle is to place an advert on this site. Look at (How to Place an
Advert).
It is
important that if your are getting into this lifestyle as a couple you do so as
part of a stable relationship and not because your relationship is lacking. It
is of utmost importance that you are as honest with each other as you should be
with any contacts you make.
The one
mistake a lot of new couples make is to seek out some one with the same lack of
experience that they have. This can lead to a very nervous first meeting which
can put some couples off for life. We would suggest that for your first time you
look for some one with a little experience in the lifestyle that you feel at
ease with.
Always follow
your gut feeling as a lot of the time you will be right. Any new relationship
you make must be based on trust and if the trust is not there in the beginning
it is starting of on the wrong foot.
Advice
to single men
Most of the
advice we can give to single men is covered in the etiquette section of this
page.
Remember that
there is a large number of single men out there looking for the same things that
you are. So it is important to stand out from the crowd, there are a few ways to
do this.
1. Always
supple a full length tasteful photo.
2. Always be
polite and do not get smutty unless you feel that is what the person you are
contacting is looking for.
3. Try to be
light and humorous as this will show you personality off better.
Advice
to single women
We would
suggest that if you are a single female and you are looking to get into this
lifestyle, you seek out a couple, female or male that you consider to have a
reasonably high profile. This will give you the security that you need. Also
always insure you have a direct contact telephone number and not just a mobile
number. If it is at all possible tell some one who you are meeting and where you
are meeting them.
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How to Place a Profile
What
should be in your ad
Your advert
should tell people about you. It should cover what you are looking for and the
type of people you would like to make contact with.
Try to list
your likes and dislikes as this will save you time when you meet.
Your advert
should attempt to show a little of your personality.
Photos
Always
include a photo of all parties involved. The best photo's should be full length
so that people can see what you look like. It also helps to down size large
photo's and crop any unneeded background area's.
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How to Use
the Chatroom
Going
private
To go private
with another user just double click on their name and check the private box, but
always remember to ask first and wait for a positive response before you private
message someone.
Ignoring
Users
To
ignore another user just click on their name and check the ignore box. You will no longer see that persons text.
Do's
& Don'ts
Do always ask
other users if they are free for a chat.
Do always be
polite and treat others as you would like to be treated.
Don't write
in caps as this is regarded as shouting and bad manners.
Don't
complain if no one is talking in public as people maybe arranging meetings with
other users.
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